The Next Einstein

Today at his 34 week ultrasound he weighed 5lbs even. His head size is in the 82nd percentile, and his belly is in the 14th percentile. The ultrasound technician teased us that this is just because he's already really smart. He's still upside down, using my bladder for his pillow. With those cute, chubby cheeks, he can use my bladder for anything he wants.

If you look carefully at this one, you can see the outline of his mouth and nose.

Here's his profile, his arm is above his face.

His fat, happy face

My Tips for Preggie Girls

*Never, ever postpone even the slightest urge to pee. That UTI will attack your bladder in seconds flat.

*The first trimester and constant worrying go hand in hand.

*It feels better to waddle. Do it.

*Eating something right before you go to bed helps you fall asleep faster.

*Make the most revolting face conceivable when you smell something disgusting. It helps you feel like you're getting some kind of revenge.

*If you get a feeling the OB you chose isn't competent or listening to what you say, don't be afraid you're hurting his/her feelings by changing to a different one. When you have your blood drawn by a nurse who searches frantically for a cotton ball while you sit there bleeding on yourself, no, your standards are not too high.

*Don't compare yourself too much to other pregnant girls, everyone's body is different, pregnant or not.

*Fight the urge to be creative when someone asks how you're feeling. Just say how you feel, so you aren't standing there with a stumped look on your face thinking of how to answer.

*That Snoogle body pillow isn't for everyone.

*Look into getting someone to give you a nickel for every time you hear, say or think the word pregnant.

*Only those uncompromising pregnancy hormones could cause you to declare war on your husband, your best friend in the world, during such an exciting time. Take deep breaths. Hope he understands.

*If someone doesn't comment on your oh-so-obvious pregnant status, that doesn't mean they aren't thinking about it. Stand near them for more than two minutes, and they'll say what they're thinking.

*It's ok to feel a little guilty when you take a Tylenol.

*Accept that you're going to be stared at. If someone isn't gawking at the belly, they're probably stressed or something's wrong with them.

*Smile at other pregnant girls.

*A lot of people look down their noses at you if you admit you're hoping specifically for a boy or a girl. Say you just want a healthy baby. That happens to be a girl.

*Mix a childcare book or two into your pregnancy book collection.

*Write down questions before your OB appointments - even if you already know the answer - so you don't feel as gipped when it's over in five minutes.

*Crunchy things make the most satisfying food choices. Specifically, pickles and ice.

*If you have a cat, let it sit on your belly and purr.

*Shopping at your favorite pre-preg clothing stores (with intent to buy XL sizes) during the third trimester will probably make you feel sad. Matt: Did you see anything? Me: Yep. Skinny girls. We belong in the maternity stores now, drink the water when they offer it to you.

*Don't pick a baby name that you wouldn't mind being named yourself.

*Try laying flat on the floor when your back hurts.

*Babies R Us sells Motherhood Maternity clothing. This saves you a trip to the mall, especially since you spend all your shopping time at Babies R Us anyway. Baby Gap also has some impressive baby gear.

*Don't feel bad swiping your hubby's second pillow to wedge behind your back when you sleep.

*It's fun to smile at baby kicks. Although I'll admit that the hiccups lose their cuteness after a couple episodes.

*Pregnancy is a privilege that not everyone is blessed with. Be really thankful and excited God gave it to you.

The Good. The Bad.

As my pregnancy waddles towards its end, and I'm finally starting to look, act and feel like a pregnant person, I'm noticing aspects I'll miss ... and things I can't wait to say goodbye to.

The Attention

The Good. More people than ever hold doors and elevators for me. If, for some reason they don't hold it and then, seconds later, notice my belly, they seem genuinely sorry.

The Bad. I have to anticipate questions and conversations with complete strangers about my pregnancy every time I buy food, baby gear, clothes, eat at a restaurant or go to a meeting at work. I've learned to have a list of answers about how I'm feeling, when I'm due, where I'm delivering, etc., etc. ready in my head at all times.

The Belly

The Good. Baby kicks and movement constantly entertain me. Even though he's been a busy baby for a couple months now, I still feel proud of him and stare at my stomach every time he moves.

I have to brag that I've been clear of a single stretch mark, and the line that goes down the center of most pregnant bellies has decided not to develop. For this, I say, Thanks Mom!

The Bad. The belly gets blatantly stared at. It doesn't fit into very many shirts, pants or even dresses. It knocks things over when I underestimate its size. It pushes my other organs up against my lungs and makes it hard to breathe. It makes rolling over in bed an all-out project.

My Youtube Vids

The Good. I've gotten an incredible amount of support, advice and compliments from my fellow Youtubers. The amount of attention my vlogs have gotten has truly amazed me.

I've loved knowing that a lot of people value my opinions and want my advice. I think every girl should be told she's pretty by complete strangers a couple times a day while she's going through pregnancy, it makes me smile, even on rough days. It's really nice to know there are girls out there going through the same things I am, and 99% of them assure me that I'm a lot smaller than I actually feel.

The Bad. There have been some negative comments about my videos - which I immediately delete - from people who harshly criticize things I say. (Strangely, these critics don't have any videos of their own, but that's beside the point) While I don't let these things bother me, I want it to be known that my videos are about how I feel and what I'm going through, and if I were to stop and think about every little thing I say in them, I wouldn't have anything to talk about and would lose all that's candid and genuine about my vlogs. If someone doesn't like the way I speak and act in my videos, he/she shouldn't watch them. That said, Matt and I get a good laugh from the "I hope you have a miscarriage" comments. Red hot rant, over.

Food

The Good. Eating anything I want has been fun, I haven't done it in a few years. I discovered so many things I never would have if I wasn't a participant in the preggo smorgasbord.

Starbucks' pecan toffee bars taste just like pecan pie. Coldstone's butterscotch pudding ice cream - I can't decide if the texture or the flavor makes me crave it. The water ice shop two blocks from my house has the best strawberry banana water ice. Friendly's has buffalo chicken tenders that are so good, I have eaten there four times in a week, despite the lengthy food service time. I won't be a bit surprised if the baby comes out demanding buffalo flavored milk. Bananas will never be eaten without peanut butter again.

The Bad. I swoon a little when I see people having some of my favorite things ... sushi, multiple cups of coffee, or eggs cooked over easy.

The Weight

The Good. For the first time in my life, I know how it feels to weigh more than 120lbs. As a kid, I was picked on for being super skinny and wished every day I could be a larger, normal weight. Now I really appreciate all that comes with having a flat stomach and bony arms and legs, and I can't wait to have mine back.

The Bad. Since my body isn't used to this new weight, my thighs burn when I walk too fast. I really miss wearing my wedding rings.

Stop reading here, boys. My biggest challenge has been finding panties that don't pinch and cut into my thighs when I'm trying to fall asleep. I've even snipped a few victim pairs around the elastic edges with scissors for relief; yesterday I caved at Matt's suggestion and bought some actual maternity underwear. While I think they're the most comfortable things ever created, I probably should have gotten a larger size. Sigh.

Baby Gear

The Good. Buying, opening and setting up brand new things for the baby has made these last few months feel like it's been a whole year of Christmas.

I can't even imagine how exciting it's going to be to actually have a baby who's going to use all this stuff. Looking at and talking about the things we have is fun as it is!

The Bad. Figuring out what's the best - and most affordable - on that wall of diapers, bottles, pacifiers, car seats, mattresses, toys, etc. is baffling. Does the nipple on the bottle really make a difference? Yes, it does, and you need to figure out why and if that reason is suitable for a baby you haven't even met yet.

Lists of questions and decisions come along with every single baby item. I can't even tell you how many times we walked away from a decision on an item because we were so confused.

Our 30 Week Bumble

This week he weighed 3lbs 11 oz -- bigger than the average 30 weeker! You'd never be able to tell by my little 30 week belly. Amazingly, he weighs almost as much as I did when I was born at 4lbs 2 oz!
We didn't get to see his face or profile too much this time, I think the ultrasound tech was in a hurry to get done for the day. Here's a picture of his chubby face; it's hard to see, but it's the best one we got: